Tag Archive: Love


I remember I once wrote an article called Punch, Drunk..Love maybe a couple of years back in my old blog. Ever since I migrated here (as in my cyber home migration), I had prevented myself to categorically stay away from love-related topics. You can never be politically correct when you are writing about love, because it is subjective, and everyone has his or her own opinion about it.

I’m sticking with the same title primarily because I think it is catchy, it epitomizes what love is all about, and above all it is the title of one my favorite films- the 2002 Adam Sandler starrer that made me go what the… (I’ll beep out the last word).

I have grown incredibly in the last two years. I have experienced pain and delight in equal measures. But this article is here primarily thanks to a certain Indian filmmaker called Baskar. When my cousin brother cajoled me to watch this movie called ‘Orange’, I was wondering what the big deal might be. But little did I know that the movie presented several ideas that are complex yet very much related to the modern world we live in.

Neither is Baskar is excellent filmmaker (Bommarilu was brilliant through) nor Ram Charan Teja a great heir to his father (too much of painful to the eye colors from him but was constantly doing things over the top). Neither is Orange a great movie. It’s quite the opposite. It’s annoying, full of unnecessary style, it tries to be funny and yet it irritates, and it’s basic presentation is just the image of a 16-year-old girl full of excitement.

Imagine a good-looking 16-year-old girl wearing all sorts of colors on her so that she would look bright but ends up looking too bright for anyone. That’s how Orange was as a movie. A fashion faux pas.

But that aside, some thirty minutes (or little bit more I guess) into the movie and you have the heroine going all flattered after seeing a lion and says she wants this love forever in her love, to which our evidently full-of-himself hero says he can only love for a short time and would later break up. That’s what this movie revolves on, the idea of love lasting only for a little while.

The thought was amazing and mature, but yet I feared the filmmakers would commit the cardinal sin of deceiving the viewers into saying love does last forever and ever- even beyond the graves we can awaken and dance duets with our loved ones.

Thankfully it did not. The idea might taste bad in many people’s mouths, but as usual, many would opt for fantasy than reality. Admittedly, you need that. Love itself is a fairytale, and to keep dream going on, you treat it like a fairytale, and always keep in mind the ‘happily ever after’ that would come at the end of the book.

But the book doesn’t end till your life ends. It doesn’t matter if you are 17, 25, 30, or 55, love will end if at some point- you start taking its presence in your life for granted.

Love, or relationships, takes plenty of effort to create and manage at the same time. How long it lasts depends on the will of two individuals more than anything.

I had said long ago in one my articles that one should use the heart as a compass to lead life. But often we superficial people tend to overlook the role our brains play in determining our lives. Our hearts can point us the right direction, but compass always remains in the pocket- you take it out only when you are lost, and even at that time a compass takes some time before it clearly points out which is your North.

Hearts are the foundation of life. But brains are the tools to live life with. A compass alone won’t be enough for you to negotiate through bushes. A compass may point north, but you might be starring down at a lake in front of you, and beyond that, a mountain. Would you, for the love of your life, blindly walk into the lake and expect to climb the mountain, all the while saying ‘the will is enough’? You’ll definitely end up drowning, like a character from a well-made tragic comedy.

This is when you keep the compass, mark your direction, look around you, and start using your brains to negotiate around the lake and around the mountain. The path that you need to take will be much more complicated, but there are no straightforward paths in life.

Run through the ways, climb the mountains, trek through anything, and you shall meet plenty of hurdles and temptations. If amidst all these you still keep faith in your dreams, in your north, only then do you deserve to reach your promise land.

Love to applies the same way. The compass points to you which person you should, or could, be with, but how you work out a relationship amidst all hurdles (trust me, you’d face more than you can imagine in today’s world), you need to use your brains, or to put it more simply- you need to do it the traditional way- take effort, work for it.

You might be 60 and have had a 40-year-old love story, and even then you are not guaranteed of a happily ever after.

Love, as narrated in Orange, initially lasts only for a certain period. It’s all fine and rosy and weak knees when you know you are in love. You are excited by someone else’s presence, you enjoy the small attention you get from him or her, it makes you dream of great things. If this small rose is this good, how good a bed of roses be?

But maintaining a bed of roses is not a given. Roses wither after some time. Everything ends. Your bed of roses (I’m referring to a relationship here) will end at some point. And when it does, there is only one way you can keep the magic going, bother to stand up, walk, pluck some new flowers, and replace the withered ones on your bed. That way, you always have your bed of roses. Don’t lie on that bed expecting it to last forever. Without proper ‘maintenance’, nothing, and I mean nothing, lasts.

Saying ‘I will love you forever’ is nothing but an assurance, an uncertainty. Nobody ‘will’ love someone forever. All you can say that you love someone right now, at this moment. And for it to last forever, you need to spend time from your everyday life, to pluck one flower at a time.

Many will scorn the fact that love isn’t magic. It should be magic, according to them, where everything falls into place, on its own. But if there is anything I learned over time, we are asking too much from God. He’s generous enough to wave his hand and give us the emotion of Love. Where Love is, there God is. In a cunning way he proves his presence, and tells us there is something in this world no scientists could ever put their fingers on.

But aren’t we being too spoiled to ask Him to keep that magic going on forever? Love is like wish, a star. It shines brightly, but He has given it to you. It is up to you to keep it shining, don’t expect Him to be your maintenance guy all the time.

Loving someone is like setting upon the sea by yourself. It’s all-nice when you could just wet your legs and run back to the beach. You look at the beauty of the sea and you wish you could swim in it with ease.

But the longer a relationship goes, the deeper into the sea you travel. After sometime, you need to forget life jackets and learn swimming on your own. Everybody stands on the beach and gazes at the beauty of the sea. But only a special someone actually swims across it and gazes at the beach from far away, with a feeling that you have conquered the sea.

If you want to conquer the sea, learn to fall in love time and again, with the same person. Love will taste like victory as well.

When love too tastes like victory, you will know you have earned and lived your life to the maximum.

-Cup your faces in shout in jubilation when you finally have learned to swim in the sea of love, that’s the ultimate emotion-

Obese with Spices

Over the years, we have known Kamal Haasan to be someone of immense ability to act. Some of us acknowledge, although to a lesser extent, that he is a great all-rounder. I personally have been a fan of his screenwriting and directorial abilities. But if there was one important film of his that I somehow managed to miss over the years, it was his 1995 film Sathi Leelavathi.

Sathi Leelavathi is more popular due to the fact that the film was later remade in Hindi as Biwi No.1 (such a catchy title eh?) starring Salman Khan and Anil Kapoor, which in turn, became one of the biggest hits in Bollywood at that time. Having watched Biwi and later recently having watched the original, the least I could say is that the remake is a travesty to the original.

There used to be days when I would ask randomly to my friends what Sathi Leelavathi is about, and the reply I would get is that it is a ‘nice comedy movie’. That’s probably what the Bollywood producers had in their minds when they remade the film, thinking that the film is just a nice comedy movie. How much farther from the truth can they be?

Admittedly the film, many believe is loosely based on the 1989 American comedy She Devil. But frankly, I’m tired of all this nonsense. Just because the film borrows the basic plotline from a Western movie doesn’t make it a bad film.

Take Anbe Sivam for instance- would you dare argue that Planes, Trains and Automobiles (the original upon which Anbe Sivam borrows plot from) is a better film that Kamal’s version? No, by a million miles. Nothing is original in this world, and all of us take inspiration from one thing or another. Just because it isn’t completely original doesn’t mean the film’s quality needs to be disregarded.

And nor did She Devil get anywhere close to Sathi Leelavathi. The writers for this film fabulously lift the Hollywood plotline and transform it into a plot that is relevant to the current Indian society, and by this I do not mean adding fight scenes and masala mixes (like how Shankar borrowed Endhiran’s plotline from Bicentennial Man adding masala elements, and oh, how conveniently did the proud Tamil fans and reviewers ignored THAT fact eh?) but instead making the plotline realistically relevant to the current society.

Sathi Leelavathi, just like many of films which has the brand Kamal attached to it, is an underrated gem.

Consider this few important scenes:

A elderly woman (mami) advises Leelavathi (Kalpana) that even though machines have been invented to do jobs for us in every part of the house, no machine has been invented for one’s bedroom pleasure. She points out boldly to Leelavathi that whilst many women take pains to look after themselves prior to marriage, they leave it all once marriage happens.

This raises such an important issue of the healthy sex life and also takes a swipe at the Indian women’s tendency to put on weight after marriage (which, I believe, is a phenomenon that is hard to miss). It points out Indian women’s lack of understanding regarding the importance of staying fit whilst participating in a healthy sex life in order to prolong the marriage.

The song ‘Marugo’ involving Kamal and Kovai Sarala’s characters healthily depict a couple’s healthy sex life after marriage, and how important they consider sex life to be even though they are now parents to a child who is entering teenhood. Notice also how Kovai Sarala’s character is independent enough on her own even though she came from the village. There is a scene in the climax where she would drive off, leaving Kamal behind, where he would rue why he taught her how to drive.

As it is common in the often-chauvinistic Indian society, the so-called traditional housewives are rarely ever thought how to be independent enough, as it is with the case of Ramesh Aravind and Kalpana’s marriage. This scene shows the other side of the coin, where an educated doctor takes the effort to cultivate his wife into an independent woman. While Kalpana rarely even leaves the house on her own and tends only to housework, Sarala’s character is shown shopping on her own, and also heading to Marudhamalai alone without her husband (during the climax).

There is also that scene where Kalpana confronts Ramesh Aravind for cheating on her. She laments her size, saying that she became fat because she was busy tending to housework all these years, and that she would have kept fit if he had told her that she keeping fit is also important to their married life. She was doing things that she ‘assumed’ would be important for him and would make him happy, only to see him get involved with a younger, good-looking woman mainly for sexual satisfaction. This scene depicts another element that is lacking in many traditional marriages, communication. A guy can’t expect a woman to take care of his parents, children, and home hygiene while staying fit at the same time. It is important to communicate and indicate what are the expectations for such marriages from the beginning.

There is also a scene where Kalpana will coldly generalize men, by saying men would feel okay if they were to cheat and find pleasure elsewhere, but it would pain them to see the woman they are involved with be with another man. Well, this phenomenon is not something new isn’t it? It exists till today in this society. Like the famous saying goes, there is a word for ‘bitch’, but there isn’t a word for manwhores.

Subsequently, in another scene, Priya’s lover Raju would say that he is ready to accept Priya back if she repents on her mistakes. He remarks that just like how Leelavathi is accepting enough to get back her husband even he had slept with Priya, the same applies for Raju. Such characters, I would boldly say, are a rarity in our society. Men who would admit and swear by equality are hard to find, let alone men who are accepting enough of loved ones.

‘Love is about accepting one’s flaws’- one particular dialogue in the film would say.

When I finished watching Sathi Leelavathi, I knew people were wrong to call it a ‘nice comedy movie’, but instead it is a socially important film with a very important message that we often tend to ignore.

This brings us to my new bone of contention, Manmadhan Ambu. It is no secret that whilst the film wasn’t a flop, they are many who are not satisfied with the movie because they consider it not to be funny enough. And some say the comical second half breaks off the good first half.

MMA carried with it similar marbles like the film I talked about earlier. The entire Kamal Kavidhai portion neatly describes men-women expectation and bias that is so prominent in today’s society.

There is the opening scene of the movie when Madhavan would suspect Trisha of two-timing him, and would ask her why is there an interconnecting door between her and Surya’s caravan. She would retort by saying ‘for the same reason there is a button on my blouse and a zip on his pants, for convenience’s sake’.

Have we ever come across such mature dialogues in Tamil cinema before?

When Urvashi tells Kamal of Ramesh Aravind’s health status, Kamal sits at the middle of a road in Paris and says ‘nadutheruvile nikuren maa’ (I’m standing in nobody’s land, symbolizing that he is hapless in the situation)

Notice also the lyrics of the song Dhagudhu Dhattam:

Dei Paanakara, Kozhi Thotta Sami Ke Enna Dhaanam Pannare,

Dei Paanakara, Ira Vakil Caaril Poi Beeram Pannare.

(Hey rich man, you are donating money to a priest who has touched the chicken (priests are supposed to vegetarians and clean people, implying corrupted priests who feast upon flesh)

Hey rich man, you travel in a posh car and you negotiate prices with a poor man

(In Kamal’s own words, when a rich man is renovating his house, he would opt for marble flooring. He would be ready to pay the money no matter how much the contractor quotes the price. The same rich man later can be seen at a wet market, fervently negioating the price of a vegetable- which would cost him peanuts anyway. It tells of the hypocrisy among the upper middle class in India)

But then again, if Kamal were to make a movie entirely of these marbles, would the masses be satisfied? It’s fair to say the man has taken enough financial battering whenever he dared to be different (see Hey Ram, Anbe Sivam, and Kurudhi Punal, all arguably his best films). The masses have indicated they needed laughter, and he inserted them towards the end of the story.

You can’t have it both ways. You can’t demand a great story and a laugh-riot at the same time. Watch boss Boss Engira Baskaran if you want the latter. Obviously that film didn’t have a story. MMA, just like Sathi Leelavathi, had a story, a very solid story. Both tackled important issues. But as usual, Tamil cinema fans, like they have done so many times before, have missed the whole point.

Movies like Endhiran, despite giving financial ‘thonti gahanapathigal’ (bellies), will not carry the cinema industry forward all on its shoulders. For all of its graphical glory, Endhiran is not the ‘mature’ movie that we really need to make the world take our industry seriously.

Hollywood has had their shares of Terminators and RoboCops, why would they consider Endhiran a threat, or even an effort on par? The Kollywood obsession with getting ‘on-par’ with Hollywood will get us virtually nowhere.

We were too busy looking for telling movie, but like the famous saying goes, what you were looking for all along usually is what you failed to see in front of your eyes. Catch some of Kamal Hassan’s films on telly sometime and bother to open up your brains and hearts and intellectuality while paying attention to details.

You will realize, what gems were we looking for? We have had movies that proved we can take a Hollywood movie and do a remake that is even miles better than the original (Anbe Sivam). We have great movies that weave fiction into reality (Hey Ram). We have had movies that tackle the demon-god realm of the human mind (Raavanan). But we didn’t see?

We don’t need 300 obscene fat crores to make the world notice us. Even 4 crores is enough. But the problem is, we, like a greedy fat man who can’t look beyond his belly to see his own feet, can’t seem to see our own completeness as an industry.

That’s not victory, that’s failure.

What you think is just a nice comedy movie might very well have been the best quality film you have seen. Only if, you actually understand what quality means in the first place.

Copyright (c) 2010. Ramyuva. All Rights Reserved